The N.E.S. Discussion
(Nonsense Etcetera Society)
OSG: Welcome, viewers, to the sixth in our series of NES Discussion episodes. Scarily enough, today we have a topic or "theme" for this show. Proving, once again, that we actually do have writers for this show, and things are sort of planned out. Sort of. Pedro has gone out of his way to bring us some really hot stars to talk with us today. We have with us today Jerry Atric from Samurai Pizza Cats, the Frankenstein monster from Frankenstein, and the Noid, from Yo Noid!. Hello, gentlemen.
Jerry: I am pleased to be here today. Pleased as mashed peas and liquefied corn. Hopefully we can have nefarious schemes without the fear of being blown up. Stupid Big Cheese.
Frankenstein: Puny mortal! I, the romantic hero, shall use my experience of being misunderstood as a literary device, and charm readers for centuries to come.
Noid: AH hahaha! I'm low on work! My agent said I could make a quick five bucks here. Buy Dominoes pizza! Cursed ferret taking my job! I'll eat him!
OSG: Great. This could get out of hand. Is it just me, or does Frankenstein look high? Maybe it's just me. Anyway, or general theme today is game over screens. Let's look at case one, Friday the 13th.
OSG: Now, if you ask me, this is a pretty pessimistic
ending. This screen basically just takes all of your efforts, rolls them
into a ball, and wipes its ass with it. Any thoughts?
Jerry: I think I need to change my depends.
Frankenstein: The worst decisions are made by the smartest men, because the smartest men are faced with the hardest choices. Alas, all we work for is in vein if we make the slightest error.
Noid: Shut up, Frankenfag, you over dramatic oaf! Eat a pizza! It'll make you less of a dork.
OSG: That was moving, Frankenstein. (Sniff). How
did you come up with that?
Jerry: Yeah. Even though that didn't really have anything to do with the ending, it was pretty brilliant... who stole my viagra? I'm looking at you, Noid.
Frankenstein: In our darkest hour, we find something deep inside and it comes to the surface. When we are near death, we realize that our ability to be ourselves is halted. Our ability to change and make decisions is nullified. In death we become objects, not people. Our freedom is frozen, and we rot away into nothingness.
Noid: SPROING! Wee! Those tasty blue pills are fun!
OSG: Let's move on, shall we? This clip comes to us from Bosuka Wars.
OSG: This game seems to be excited when you loose,
as if it were some sort of great accomplishment. What's your take on this,
Jerry: Well, Conan, I'm starring in the upcoming film, Grumpy Old Men 3: Cryogenic Crazynes.
Frankenstein: If we stop making decisions, we stop defining ourselves. We have the freedom to make choices, thus we have the freedom to create ourselves. There is no such thing as human nature, as that would be a prison. We'd be destined to be an object; a tool.
Noid: Hey, what are these blue and yellow pills? I think I'll pop a few...
OSG: Noid, give Jerry his pills back. I think he's
losing his mind... Mister Stein, I'll have to address your brilliant statements
later. Let's try to stay on topic, huh?
Jerry: Stevey! Get down! The bombs are coming! Get in the foxhole! ... Stevey... NOOOO!
Frankenstein: We can accomplish anything if we try hard enough. I forgive you all for judging me. If only humanity could accept what it does not understand.
Noid: *twitch* Ohmygodthiscannotbegood... ! *THUNK* gurrrrrgle...
OSG: Holy hell! The Noid just overdosed! Get the medical team in here, stat! Uh, uh, get the next topic on screen! This is from Pachio 2.
OSG: Breathe, Noid. The first aid will be here
Jerry: So, I was standing on the front of the titanic with the most beautiful woman in my arms. We didn't really know each other, but she sat around nude for me while I pretended to draw her.
Frankenstein: My word, what a scene.
Noid: *Convulse* gurgle... *vomit*
Medical Crew #1: Who did this to the Noid? He's
a big star!
Medical Crew #2: It must have been that big green dead guy! I don't know what it is, so that seems legit to me!
Medical Crew #1: Kill it!
Frankenstein: Blargh! I will crush your skulls if provoked!
OSG: Cut! Fade to black! Go to a commercial! ANYTHING!
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